funny holiday quotes

A curse on every wish that blurs the sight, paralyzes the tongue, cramps the hand, and prevents the truth being seen, said, and written. ~Theodor Haecker



The right to private property meant at the same time the right and duty to be personally concerned about your own well-being, to be personally concerned about your family's income, to be personally concerned about your future. This is hard work. ~Mikhail Khodorkovsky



A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. ~Michel de Montaigne, Essays



You know you're in love when you don't want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. ~Dr. Seuss



The great thing about getting older is that you don't lose all the other ages you've been. ~Madeleine L'Engle



We are all parasites; we humans, the greatest. ~Martin H. Fischer



It doesn't require any particular bravery to stand on the floor of the Senate and urge our boys in Vietnam to fight harder, and if this war mushrooms into a major conflict and a hundred thousand young Americans are killed, it won't be U.S. Senators who die. It will be American soldiers who are too young to qualify for the Senate. ~George McGovern



The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. ~Phyllis Diller



He who does not know how to believe, should not know. ~Antonio Porchia, Voces, 1943, translated from Spanish by W.S. Merwin



The problem with children is that you have to put up with their parents. ~Charles DeLint



It's a nasty divorce when they can't agree on how to divvy up the His and Hers towels. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com



Human nature, if healthy, demands excitement; and if it does not obtain its thrilling excitement in the right way, it will seek it in the wrong. God never makes bloodless stoics; He makes no passionless saints. ~Oswald Chambers



Gratitude is an art of painting an adversity into a lovely picture. ~Kak Sri



It is hard to convince a high-school student that he will encounter a lot of problems more difficult than those of algebra and geometry. ~Edgar W. Howe



The art of love... is largely the art of persistence. ~Albert Ellis



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But while so many white Americans are unaware of conditions inside the ghetto, there are very few ghetto dwellers who are unaware of the life outside. The television sets bombard them day by day with the opulence of the larger society. ~Martin Luther King, Jr., Where Do We Go from Here: Chaos or Community?, 1967



He who opens a school door, closes a prison. ~Victor Hugo



Grandchildren don't stay young forever, which is good because Pop-pops have only so many horsey rides in them. ~Gene Perret



Is it not clear, however, that bliss and envy are the numerator and denominator of the fraction called happiness? ~Yevgeny Zamyatin